I can do anything.

13 weeks Surgical (aspiration) abortion with Misoprostol I had my abortion or got my abortion pills from a local hospital or independent health clinic


When did you discover you were pregnant? November 13th 2020


Was the pregnancy planned? No


What was the very first thought in your mind when that pregnancy test was positive? No. I don't want to do this.


Describe how you felt in the days after you realized you were pregnant. Scared. Anxious. Confused.


What factors did you consider when making a choice? My mental and physical health, money, my 2 year old daughter.


Did the person who got you pregnant support you during your abortion? Yes


What is the nature of your relationship with the person who got you pregnant? In partnership


Who was the most supportive or helpful person or resource during your choice-making process? My husband


Who was the most supportive or helpful person in your life during and after your abortion? My husband


Describe your overall abortion experience using three words: Positive. Freeing. Great.


Please Describe your abortion experience. I woke up at 5am. I couldn't sleep so I just started getting ready. I ate half a granola bar, straightened my hair and put on makeup. I got a nosebleed, I never get nosebleeds. We headed to the clinic at 7:45, my appointment was at 8:25 and we were nervous about getting there since we were from out of state. We made good time and I put on headphones as we pulled into the parking lot. I had "Close Your Eyes and Count to F*ck" by Run the Jewels cued up and ready to go to drown out the protesters. My husband pulled up to the front door and before I could even get out, there was a clinic escort waiting to take my arm and guide me inside. She complimented my matching shoes and bag and distracted me from all the yelling going on. I checked in with security and was allowed in to the building where they took my name and temperature and told me they would email me the intake paperwork to fill out. I sat in the waiting room for a few minutes, checking boxes and reading about the side effects of the procedure i was about to have. Then a nurse called my name and lead me back to a procedure room to do my ultrasound. She told me I was a week further along than I thought I was and I flipped out, thinking they wouldn't do the procedure that day. She assured me everything was fine. Then I was lead to a room to do my counseling and medical history over the phone. It was easy, the lady was nice and laughed a lot, which put me at ease. Next, I paid cash for my procedure and felt silly asking for a receipt (it's my only keepsake from the whole thing). Then the nurse gave me ibuprofen, an antibiotic and 2 pills I was to let dissolve in my cheeks. She took me to another room to wait, where there were other girls who'd already had their procedures done. It was kind of weird but I was giddy. This was really happening. I texted with my husband because I couldn't focus enough to read. The time flew by and soon, another nurse was calling my name. I followed her back to another procedure room where I assumed she was going to check my cervix and see if the pills were working. I was wrong. She started getting out tools and equipment and I realized it was showtime. An anesthesiologist came in to give me my twilight sedation, followed by the doctor and another nurse or two. I laid back and put my feet up and then everything became a blur. I felt pinched inside of me and then a tugging that made me squeeze the anesthesiologist's hand as hard as I could. She told me how well I was doing and that it was just a few seconds more. Then it was over. I remember thanking the doctor, who never said a word, and being wheeled into recovery. They gave me a heating pad I didn't need and a blanket and Sprite. A few minutes later, they checked my blood pressure and my bleeding. A few minutes after that, they called my husband to come pick me up. I sat at a table talking to the nurses until he arrived and then, I practically skipped out the door. I was overjoyed to no longer be pregnant and oh so relieved.


What were your expectations of yourself and others? I hoped my husband would support my decision. I hoped the people providing me with healthcare didn't judge me.


In this section, describe your feelings at the time you had your abortion. Nervous. Anxious. Excited.


What about after the abortion? Did your feelings change? I never faltered in my decision. I was and am proud of my choice.


"What about the feelings of others? While you might not know exactly what they were feeling, can you explain what you think they might have been feeling? I think my husband was a little sad. He wants another child. I think the doctors and nurses were... bored? They do this everyday. It doesn't phase them.


In what ways has your abortion experience changed you? I am stronger. I am more self-assured.


Have your goals changed as a result of your abortion experience? Yes, my abortion experience was a catalyst for new goals and a new outlook on life


What have you learned about your ability to make choices? I can do anything.


Will you make the same choices in the future? Yes.


Select all statements are true for you after your abortion I have a greater appreciation for the value of my own life., I have developed new interests., I have a greater feeling of self-reliance., I more clearly see who I can count on in times of trouble., I know that I can handle difficulties., I am better able to accept the way things work out., I can better appreciate each day., I have more compassion for others., I am more likely to try to change things that need changing., I have stronger faith in myself., I discovered that I’m stronger than I thought I was.


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It woke me up.

I feel grateful for my two unborn children, for not only waking me the FUCK up, but for allowing me to live my life